June 2007
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Friday, 6-29-7
Hello my friends and welcome back to another episode of "Sleep Deprivation Theatre"
I am coming off of another
long night that fed into another long day. With only three hours sleep in
the last 48, things are going to get interesting for me by tonight.
As usual, I have been running around the state on behalf of the FA with little
to no sleep. In my few moments of "normalcy" I have not typed up an update
for the website. So nothing has changed...
As I drove from Pensacola to Orlando (by way of Jacksonville) I was struck by a sudden flash of inspiration and I ended up pulling over on the side of the road to note it all down. I limped into the next rest stop where I spent three hours typing at all out on the laptop. The muse strikes me at the most inconvenient times. Why not when I'm sitting in a hotel room with nothing to do? Oh well, I got a few new chapters out of it and I think I am approaching the 90k count. I still have the denouement to come and I'll top out well over 110k. I haven't turned on my "editing side of my brain" and I already know of a few scenes that I need to trim down. Too much info-dump that I never used later in the story. So the final work will be closer o a nice trim 100k. This will be my fifth novel-length work completed and I am promising Teresa that it will be the last one to burn. She gets so frustrated that I never let her read them. I never promised that I'd let her read any new stuff, just that I'd stop setting them ablaze.
Last weekend was supposed to be my "big weekend alone" when I could just hang out and let loose without the family around. Well, that never happens with me. I mowed the lawn (some of it anyway) and cleaned off the back patio. I went out with some friends but nothing I wouldn't have done if Teresa weren't in town. I cleaned up what mess I had made in the house and then went back to work. Time off is a very relative term and I live a very boring life without my family around.
Friday I made it back in to town in time to visit with Wade and pull out the scuba gear. I didn't realize how "stored away" it was. It took us a while to gather but by Friday evening we had the gear ready and all we needed was to rent the air tanks for Sunday's dive. Wade showed off is talents by making me a pen out of a random chunk of Cypress log lying on the workbench. He is very talented and I am always impressed with how he sees the object in the raw wood and coaxes it out using these awesome tools. I've got a really nice "stuff holder" he made for me sitting up on my computer. He made a really nice plate/bowl for Teresa that she keeps up on her altar. He says that some of his stuff is in a local art gallery and it really is beautiful. I bought a new notebook to go with my new pen. I've already started a bunch of ideas in it, let's see if I finish any of them.
Originally
Saturday was booked for Kristin's 16th birthday party but it was
postponed.
I kept
Saturday open to hang out with Heffner but he was busy so I ended up at the
scuba shop renting tanks and then mowing the lawn. The shop can be real
depressing because I saw that I'll need just under $1000 in order to buy my own
gear. Lisa said I should look at e-Bay but the thought of buying used scuba
gear on line scares the hell out of me. So Saturday day was spent and I was
really looking forward to an evening of just flat-out nothingness. I was going
to cook up an experimental dinner and just laze around, maybe play some StarCraft. I just wanted to melt down. While getting the tanks from the shop,
Wade tells me that although Kristin's party was cancelled there will still be a
few people getting together and hanging out. I just wanted to stay at home
tonight... BUT, how can I be reluctant to drive across town when John and Dawn (I
missed you Jeannie!) are driving in from across the state? I was just so tired
and lazy... And I was glad I got off my fat ass and showed up. Nothing amazing
or spectacular happened except that feeling you get from hanging around good
people and that is spectacular enough for me.
Sunday was fun. Once again, not for the events of the day but for the company. We drove out to "Peacock Springs" and the water was incredibly low. The drought conditions are lowering the springs to the point that only cave divers are bothering with them for the most part. We drove over to "Troy Springs" and although the water was low there too, we decided it would be a waste to come all this way and not even get wet. If we used Wade's tanks we would have turned around and gone home but returning rented tanks full of air is just a sin. We geared up and headed down to the dive hole. Hitting that water takes my breath away every time. It's cold and it's deep but it's also that exhilaration that tells me that we're diving again. I'll never get tired of that feeling. Some say that diving the springs is boring and I understand why they say that. This dive was 30 minutes with a max depth of 68 feet in a 40 foot wide sink hole. In this situation, that's about 20 minutes too long. There was nothing to see, nothing to do but I never noticed that. I never experienced the boredom that most people feel from a dive like this. I was elated the entire time and having fun just being under the water and breathing. I'm like a fanboy meeting the singer in his favorite band. I just giggled and grinned the whole time. Maybe after a few hundred dives I'll be bored with the springs but right now I don't see how anyone can ever get tired of floating 'weightless' through the water and seeing the bottom of a spring. Rolling over on your back and falling to the bottom while looking up at the sun filtering in through the water. The outline of the spring walls so clearly defined in that shimmer of light and dark. It is magical to me every time, even on an admittedly dull dive like this one. We swam around looking into every dark crevice and sticking our heads as low into the output flow as we could. After 30 minutes of that, you're ready to be done with the dive. I practiced my buoyancy and although I am getting better about staying neutral enough to stay off of the bottom (most of the time) I still need to work on staying horizontal instead of vertical. I need to practice a LOT! On the way back up it was cool to see the swimmers diving into the spring and bobbing back up to the surface. 60 feet doesn't seem so deep until you look up and see the perspective of someone at the surface. So we had fun and when we got home we cleaned up the dive gear and laid it out to dry.
We laid the gear out on my new trailer. I bought (in the process of buying) a trailer from Wade and Dianne. It is an old pop-up camper type and they decided it was going to be impractical to repair/rebuild it like they intended. The canvas was the straw that broke the camel's back. So, he's going to get another one that is in good shape and I am buying this one to use strictly for transport and storage. I can fit all of the camping gear (including Teresa's bed) in this thing and I think I'll have a small amount of room left over. I just need to put a trailer hitch on Teresa's truck and replace some of the plywood on the bottom. The top cranks up nicely and will keep our gear safe and dry so that I can keep it in the trailer year round instead of loading it back and forth into the storage unit. As soon as I get the hitch installed I'm going to pick it up and start the minor work it needs, like a coat of black paint and a few skulls painted on it...
Let's talk movies. I have been watching a lot of movies recently but very few new ones. I was called out for it this weekend about how my movie reviews have come to a stop recently. Well, I don't write up movies I've seen over and over. I just watched the Godfather Part 2 and I just finished watching the commentary tracks on the original Star Wars trilogy.
Quick aside: It is always an argument that Luca$ had written out every detail of the 6 (9?) movies before he filmed the first one. Some people defend the shitty new movies and wave away the glaring flaws by saying that they were planned in Luca$' mind all along and therefore are not flaws. I submit to you, the commentary track for "The Empire Strikes Back" in which Luca$ says he had to invent the Yoda character because he didn't realize how important the ObiWan Kenobi character was going to be and that he shouldn't have killed him off so quickly. If this is true, then he didn't conceive Yoda until he started writing Empire and he was not a major character in the prequel series. I have serious doubts that he wrote anything more than a basic outline for the plot and that's about it. That's not a problem until you get "VaderFan" on line arguing with you that Luca$ is the omnipotent God of the SW universe and that he had the entire story written "as is" even before he started filming any of it. I don't believe in ANY omniscient being and if I did, I would say that Luca$ is phoning-in his God duties. Ok, enough of this...
So, I have watched some new movies recently. I have to write up reviews for them so they are coming. I watched/dozed through "Phat Girlz" yesterday because I was flipping through the channels, saw the end of "Entrapment" and while I dozed off, the remote fell off the bed and tumbled out of reach. I awoke to the "Next on HBO" music and decided it was too much to get up and find the remote so I actually suffered through "Phat Girlz" while trying unsuccessfully to get back to sleep. You won't see a review of "Entrapment" because I've seen it a few times already. You should see a review of "Phat Girlz" because it was new to me but you won't. I have blocked it from my memory. I'm sure that the new "Back To School" remake will be just as promising as the "Honeymooners" remake was. Here's as racist and bigoted as I get: Why do they think that sticking a black actor in a white actor's role will sell movies? Jackie Gleason and Rodney Dangerfield are fat white men. Replacing them with fat black men makes it funny? I don't get it. So will it work if we remake "Roots" with Jerry Seinfeld as Kunte Kinte? What about "Guess Who's Coming To Dinner?" with Ashton Kutcher in place of Sidney Poitier? Oh wait, that's been done... AND IT WASN'T VERY GOOD WAS IT!?!?! The shock of dropping in a race reversal isn't very funny. Come up with some good ideas of your own and stop robbing the graves of those that came before you. I'm always simplifying movies down to their basics. I am a writer that is well aware of the basic plots and the fact that nothing is new BUT, a good writer should be able to tell the same story a hundred different ways. Tell your version but don't trample on what came before you by spewing out the same old tired bits with the novelty of having a black man where we are used to seeing a white man. It doesn't work. A lot of these early movies that I cherish are crap. They were the right movie at the right age and I love them now. "Back to School" sucked. Even with Sam Kinison as Professor Turgeson, it was by no means a great film BUT, I saw it at the right time when I really got a kick out of simple movies like that. And someone else must have felt the same way or they wouldn't try to do a remake of it, no matter how ill-conceived I think it is...
Paris Hilton is the news this week. I saw a headline during her release that said, "Paris Hilton is free at last." Like she's Nelson fucking Mandela or the plight of an entire race or something. "Free at last, free at last. Thank Lee Baca she's free at last." That's about all I've got on that. She's already eaten up way too much of my time by my even mentioning her. I was going to work in some kind of semi-witty comment about the occupation of France and the liberation of Paris but she's not even worth the effort.
I had to replace the bass drum head on my set this weekend. It developed a flaw in the skin a while back so I wasn't upset, just surprised when it went. It died on me during the rare time I get to play and too late to get to the music store. Dammit!
So I
screwed around on YouTube. I saw a video someone put together of all the Dr.
Who re-generations. It was kind of cool but I'm ignorant of most of the Dr. Who
series. I only watched some of the show during the 4th doctor who
appears to have been the most popular doctor by what I read on-line.
I also found
a clip of "Downfall" that has a funny over dub. It was the bunker scene where
they tell Hitler that the Allies have broken through and will soon roll in to
Berlin. Hitler goes spastic and eventually plans his suicide/death. The while
scene was in German but the English sub-titles was about Microsoft banning
Hitler's X-Box for being a modified console and he can never play on-line
again. He goes spastic and really gets upset when one of his guys suggests
buying a Nintendo Wii. "OH that would go over well, Hitler gives up and decides
to play with his Wii. That would be a great headline for the enemy!!!" It was
funny.
Thursday, 6-21-7
I got into a long conversation with the girl behind the counter at the hotel this morning. This is the third time this week someone has mentioned playing RPGs to me. Are they making a comeback? Strange things are afoot at the Circle K... Earlier this week I was invited to possibly take a road trip and join in on a game with a group that plays regularly. I REALLY want to go but I have to admit, I'm scared out of my mind. I haven't played in over fifteen years and even then it was with a lot of "house rules" our group had developed. I used to play every game I could get in on back in the old days. D&D is always the primary game but there were always other worlds like "Top Secret", "Boot Hill" and "Gamma World". I even knew a guy that had a "Tunnels and Trolls" game going. I haven't dealt with "new" rules or "outside groups" since I was still in Jr. High. Ever since then I've played with essentially the same group. I'm worried I'll slow down the game and become a nuisance. I'm not afraid of looking foolish or stupid. If I was worried about that I'd never post my bullshit up here. I'm afraid of not being capable of playing up to these other guy's standards. Well bollocks to it all, if the game approaches and I'm still invited to go, I'll go. I really would love to play again, even if I'm rusted shut.
I got the website up last
night just as I promised. Because a lot of posts are made, some of them get
buried under the new ones. For example, there are three new posts under
Teresa's June page. June 10th, 11th and 20th.
Some new movies were added... Basically, we've been "down" since the first week
in June so if you want to know what's new, read everything posted in June.
You
will see some changes around here eventually. I can't promise when but
the comments board will be taken off of the third party server and hosted right
here on our page. Also we are looking into adding blog software which will
"pretty up" the rather dull pages and will also allow Teresa to update her own
page without passing it through me. I've never censored her or anything but
this way she can post more often and be completely independent of me. I know
I've promised this all before but we have been actively discussing it recently.
I almost succeeded in avoiding distractions last night. I got up for a break and turned on the TV. AFI was counting down the greatest movies ever again. I like movies, I could watch this, right? NO! I know now why I will never be a serious movie connoisseur. I actually screamed out loud, no real words, just a kind of, "Ahhhckkkaaaahhhhewwwwwwlalalalalalal". I'm not sure what the people on the other side of the hotel wall thought of it but I just couldn't hold it back when they compared "Titanic" to "Casablanca". Twice! I thought it might just be an accident the first time but the said it again a second time. It may or may not be a fair comparison but it makes my brain explode when I hear people authenticate new movies by making the most cursory comparisons to true classics. "You know, 'Space Truckers' is the modern day 'Star Wars' because they both take place in space and they have ships and there's a girl and stuff..." Luckily it was so offensive to my brain that I turned off the TV and returned to the job at hand and I got the rest of the website up and running.
Another thought occurred to me while the television was on. Why is it I am inundated with commercials for stuff that I can't buy without a prescription from a doctor? If I can't buy it, why are they trying to sell it to me? I saw one that said it was safe to take forever, as long as your doctor prescribes it. It made me think that people are self-medicating themselves too much and we have become a nation of people that aren't quite hypochondriacs but damn close. If the doctor has to prescribe it, that means only the doctor needs to know about the different brands right? Only the doctor needs to see these commercials. Why would there be national ad campaigns unless people were out there and saw the medication on the TV, liked the commercial and asked their doctor to prescribe the medication for them.
I go to the doctor when I think something is wrong with me. Bleeding from both eyes, loss of an arm, hairy palms, shit like that... And when I go to the doctor he fixes me up and if I need medicine, he gives me some or gives me a prescription. The way I look at it, the prescription should be the RESULT of the doctor visit, not the CAUSE of the doctor visit. Too many people are out there watching these beautiful commercials describing symptoms we ALL have from time to time but they decide that they are now sick and in need of this new miracle drug. They go to their doctor and ask for it. The doctor has been wined, dined and golfed by the pharmaceutical reps so he has no problem with filling out the prescription form. How many of these people actually need the medication? What is the percentage of the American population on regular medications now? I would LOVE to see a real statistic on this. An honest one. The old people are always on pills. That is to be expected but now they are living longer and there are more of them. Now people are putting their children on medications all the damn time! What percentage of the population between 20 and 50 is on a daily med and how many of them actually need it? A lot of the people taking those pills would be just as happy taking a sugar pill if they saw a commercial for it and had to have a prescription for it.
Now there's a diet pill that actually says to stay close to the bathroom the first week of taking it? It says to bring a change of clothes to work because of "sudden, uncontrollable bowel movements." Are people really so desperate to lose three or four pounds that they are willing to shit themselves in a board meeting? Don't answer that one, I know the answer. We are surrounded by disillusioned and shallow people that have cashed in their personalities and exchanged them for whoever is on the cover of the rag magazines this week. "Ohh, I want to be like Leonardo DeCaprio, Angelina Jolie, George Clooney and whoever is next".
Diet pills, blood pressure, diabetes, Prozac. Everyone has to take five or six pills before leaving the house. You all know me and you all know that I was on medication for a couple of years. I didn't want to be on it, I resisted it every inch of the way. But when Teresa told me it was time to see the doctor or it was time to see a lawyer, I went in to be evaluated. The doctor told me that I was a picture perfect case of someone who needed these pills to balance everything out. And I'll admit, they worked for the most part. But after a while, I realized that I was going to be on these damned things for the rest of my life and I looked for another way to fix this. I realized that by taking those stupid pills I was allowing the blame to be moved off of me and on to some mysterious "chemical imbalance". I no longer had to take responsibility for my actions, everything could be conveniently blamed on those pills and no one (especially me) had to look beyond it and see what those pills were hiding; my own weakness. I didn't like that and I took actions to correct that. I incorporated things in my life that allowed me to grow beyond that weakness. Why wallow in your shortcomings by taking a pill when you can eradicate them by growing as a person and gaining personal strength? But no, everyone takes their little mental health pills and sees their therapist twice a week.
I know that some things can't be overcome and that some medications are necessary for a person to live a full life. But I am concerned that this has become a minority in a sea of people that are in love with being sick. We are keeping the sick and weak alive longer and we are creating more sick and weak people by convincing them that something is wrong with them. Where does it end?
Ohh man am I happy for the [DELETE] key. I just wrote a page and a half rant about evolution, eugenics and the futility of our species. It got ugly and I went WAY off topic. I'll sign off now and let you off the hook. If you're interested in snake oil, I'll sell you all you like. Its list of properties is limited only by your imagination. It will put hair on your chest and cure polio. If you've got too much hair it will also serve as a wonderful hair remover. It will keep you awake on those long drives but it may cause drowsiness and I wouldn't operate heavy machinery. Be sure to take with food and hey, make sure you bring those little white slips of paper because my snake oil is available only by prescription.
Wednesday, 6-20-7
I'm posting fast and furiously in order to beat the storm coming this way. Like I said, no distractions. I left the WarCraft CD at home (intentionally) and my recent writing project has just hit the 60k word count and I still haven't even started the third portion yet so I'm at a good stopping point there. I just watched both "Conan" movies back to back last night so I have no movies to watch right now. If I can keep myself from surfing the net for useless crap like Urban Sniper and shit like that, I will attain my goal of rebuilding the site tonight.
My keyboard is starting to drop the letter "a" and my misspellings will have to take a back seat to the rush to get this posted tonight. I will proofread and correct this later (maybe).
Somewhere in here I lost the post from last weekend when we went down to Mom and Dads to do a little light work around the house. I've got it in here somewhere but if I keep looking for it right now, I'll never get the website back up as I promised. Especially since the lightning strike jolted me upright in the chair and now that I have looked, the sky is black and it's only 4pm. I'm still having trouble with picture galleries since I moved to the new servers. I tried reverse engineering some code to find out why and all that but what I just need to do is resubmit them. I'll wait until next weekend as Teresa will have plenty of pictures from Pennsylvania and I still need to post Becca's latest Disney picture. As another famous witch said, all in good time...
Monday night I slept in my own bed at home but alone for the first time in a long time. It never fails to surprise me how difficult it is to sleep without Teresa when I'm home but I have gotten used to it when I'm on the road. It is weird. When I'm home she always has the ceiling fan running as well as a small fan by her head running on high. I can't stand that fan. It always dries out my eyes and it's impossible to hear the TV. When I'm on the road I rejoice in the fact that I get to set up the room the way I want it. No fan in my face. But when I'm home and she's not, I miss her. I actually turned on that infernal fan Monday night. I like the faux-bachelor life weekend but I miss Teresa a lot and I look forward to her return. I'm such a wimp...
I finished up the trip report with a line about schedules. Most people I know are always surprised when our plans are booked four and five weekends ahead. I'm surprised that most people AREN'T booked up. With so much to do out there, what is everyone doing? We go places, do things, visit people. If we just left it to chance, none of it will get done. Too many last minute plans are suggested and we almost never get to do them because we're already doing something else. Very rarely, a date will come up when we have nothing to do and no plans are made. That's a lazy movie weekend. But they are few and far between. Most of the time they are a yard work/mow the lawn weekend. This weekend should be one of them but I'm working on blowing it off, Teresa's not around to police me, the yard can look like shit for another week or two. Depending on when I get back in town from work, I have to get over to Wade's to check diving gear, Saturday I'm driving down to Palm Bay/Melbourne. Sunday Wade and I are diving (finally!) It's been forever since I've been able to get in a dive. I've had opportunities but the timing never works out right. I will be so happy to get back under water. Even if it's just in a damn retention pond. I have often thought about bringing the gear down to my parent's house and diving in their swimming pool. I would have, but I don't own all my own gear yet. I have the mask and fins but the vest and regulator are still loaners so I can't just pack up and go whenever I want to.
So this empty weekend filled up fast. Next weekend the clan should be coming back in to town so we'll have a full house. Beyond that, we're trying to join in on some camping trips, we have to make it back down to Mom and Dad's to pick up Pagan ASAP (and maybe do a little swimming pool diving...), we have Lizzy to entertain, friends and family to visit, time is running out and schedules are filling up fast! I think it's great. What am I doing if I'm not busy living life?
Monday, 6-18-7
We drove up to
Pennsylvania this weekend. The ride up was stormy and long but thankfully
absent of any real drama or problems. Becca's earache turned out to be a full
blown infection and the rain created a few "driving blind down a mountain at
70mph" situations but other than that, it was quiet.
We had Luna in the car with
us so we really couldn't stop anywhere for lunch or dinner. We had dropped
Pagan off at my Mom and Dad's last weekend because he likes it down there and
we're not sure he's ready for a trip like this. He's much more of a
relaxing/pampered dog than the running/jumping/hunting dog atmosphere up here.
That and he gets carsick so, he gets a nice vacation relaxing with Kittie this
week.
We hit the rest stops and
gas stations for potty breaks and she took advantage of surprisingly few of
them. The map program always says it is a 14 hour drive but every time I drive
it, even with nominal stops, it is a solid 18 hour drive. It's like the
twilight zone up here. Once we hit Virginia I don't care how long it takes.
The driving is easier and the scenery is to die for. I'm tired and I'd like to
be in a bed but if I have to be behind the wheel I'd rather do it here than in
the boring flatlands of Florida.
I had my favorite
road-kill story happen on this trip. My previous favorite was Thom's story of
having to clean a fish off of the front of a car (a large bird dropped it). My
story isn't a funny or as dramatic but I liked it. We had seen the deer on the
side of the road and had a close call with a baby bunny. It was dark and there
were no cars around. Teresa was dozing off in the passenger seat. I shouted
and woke her up, "Hey cool! Look at this, Look!" She bolted upright, scared.
She finally saw that I was pointing at the windshield. A small blotch of green
light was glowing on the windshield. It was like a large droplet from the
inside of a green glow-stick. I had to assume we had just hit a lightning bug.
That or we hit an alien! I had never seen that before. The glow lasted about
ten or twelve seconds and faded out. I wonder how it would look if you drove
through a whole bunch of them at once.
We finally arrived around
3am. The last 45 minutes was the worst. They were familiar roads, we have
driven them a hundred times, but after a long trip they seemed to stretch on
forever. 18 hours is too long for a human to be trapped in a tiny little Isuzu.
By the end of my little report, you'll learn a simple list of three things to do and three things to NOT do.
NEVER:
Cut before knowing the final plan
Dry-fire a bow
Open a gate near horses
DO:
Enjoy the fresh air
Empty a bottle of wine (or two)
Sit by a fire, enjoy your loved ones
Friday we drove around and
did some chores. We took Becca to the doctors and got her some medicine for her
ear. We went to the market and got some vegetables. That was about the extent
of it but we took the long way around on all the roads. Teresa drove do she
wouldn't get motion sick. We enjoyed the sights and the conversation. Well,
the three of us did. Lizzy and Becca each had their iPods in their ears. That
didn't stop them from complaining that they were hungry though.
While we were out we stopped by the sportsman store looking for
instructions/advice on loading Jerry's new pistol. An 1850's model black
powder 44cal. I looked around and fantasized about wining the lottery
because that was the only way I'd get everything I wanted in this store. I
fell in love with an oversized canoe and about four different rifles.
Money money money...
I did buy some arrows
though. Jerry said he had a new bow and I wanted to shoot it when we got home.
I was looking at the arrows and I was amazed to see how expensive they were.
$10 for just the shaft!? That was average price too. Some of them went up to
$20! To build an arrow with all of the parts you could easily spend between $20
to $60. For just ONE arrow! I started to rethink my idea when one of the guys
in the store finally came over. I told him I was looking for some simple target
practice arrows and he grabbed a bunch from behind the counter. $2.50 each and
that includes shaft, noc, tip and flights. I was much happier and bought five
of them.
We got home and started to relax for real. Jerry had me cut one of the burn barrels down for a small fire ring. I wanted to cut above the first ridge so the ridge would still be part of the barrel but Jerry insisted I cut below it "for strength". Well, I thought we'd have more strength if we cut above it but it's his saw, his barrel and his fire. I grabbed the saw and cut from the top, down past the first ridge and then around the barrel. It took me a while to figure it out but Jerry wanted the TOP third of the barrel for the fire ring not the bottom two thirds! I just cut through the ring and ruined it. I can be so stupid. Know what you are cutting for BEFORE you start to cut.
So I can be stupid but I can also be ignorant. I know next to nothing about horses. They have hooves, John Wayne rode one, I fell off one once and they are strong animals. That's about it. One thing I learned; even small horses are not the same as large dogs. We went to gather some wood for the fire and had to go into the horse pen. When we were carting it back out, I opened the gate and just held Lizzy's mini horse back with my leg. Much like you would do if you were going out the front door and holding the family dog back. The horse did a full leap, cleared my leg without so much as a thought and then ran around for ten minutes while I looked dumb, calling to it like I would a dog. Jerry eventually got the horse back into the pen but how was I supposed to know? I know jack shit about horses.
Jerry got his bow out and
I drew it back. I'd guess it was a 30 to 40 pound pull and I let it go with a
"SNAP!" I hadn't shot a bow in years but I never remembered them being that
loud. It sounded like a gunshot. I tried to draw it back a second time and
couldn't. The string had come off of the bottom cam. It was impossible to try
to pull it back on and after searching for the right tools we noticed a crack in
the fork holding the pully. We took it into the shop and the guy said it looks
like it was dry-fired. I know enough to not dry-fire a gun but why not a bow?
I asked why and the guy looked at me like I just asked him if I could stuff his
favorite dog's ass with razor blades. He explained that without an arrow, there
was nowhere for the energy to go. I just couldn't believe that this light
arrow, which provided almost no resistance, could absorb that much energy.
So, after a lesson on how
fucking stupid I was, the guy put the bow on a press and reset the sting and
told us where the distributor was for replacing the cracked bow arm. When we
got there, the guy asked if it had ever been dry-fired. Apparently, this is a
big deal and only stupid fucks like me ever dry-fire a bow. It was a nice $650
bow but now it's a wall decoration.
Well kids, Mr. Wizard just died last week so I'll have to do my best to display my ignorance for all to see. Physics is a strange world. Stranger still to those of us that slept and planned world domination during physics class. I know enough but if I had paid attention I could have learned so much more...
Energy must be dissipated. You store up energy by pulling back the bowstring and when it is released, it creates a great amount of force. When used properly (like, WITH an arrow) the bow concentrates most of the energy into the arrow and what is left over is absorbed by the bow arms and felt as vibration in the handle. When you have no arrow, the bow absorbs all of the energy and you fuck up a perfectly good bow. Now that I have looked it up on line, it is apparently the primary cardinal sin and a true sign of someone who doesn't know shit for a bow to be dry-fired. The guy in the store and all of the reading I've done on line tell me that I was very lucky that the bow didn't literally explode and send pieces all over the place when it happened. If a bow creates "x" force, the arrow must weigh "y" grains. If you use too light of an arrow in too heavy of a bow, it is almost the same as dry-firing it. So, there is much more to it than I thought.
While Jerry and I were at
the archery shop, Teresa built a fire and when we got back we all cooked hot
dogs on sticks and threw fresh sweet corn on the coals. We sat at the fire
having our impromptu dinner and drinking wine. Talking shit and enjoying
the cool night air. The kids wanted to go inside because their iPod
batteries had run low and they were stuck sitting around "bored". How can
you be bored in this world? There's so much to do, so many things to
learn, boredom is just something I haven't felt in a long time. Even when
there's nothing to do, there's something running round in my mind...
After it started to get
dark (around 9:30), the girls went inside and Jerry followed shortly after.
Teresa and I sat by the fire for a while longer and just enjoyed the time
alone. "This is what I imagine" was all I had to say and she just agreed,
knowing just what I meant. We sat and cuddled by the fire for just long enough
to be perfect.
After Teresa went inside I
sat and watched the fire for a few more minutes. I figured I had the time,
everyone inside was settling down in front of the television and I only had one
more full day up here. I'd rather make the most of it before I have to leave
rather than waste it in front of the TV. So I sat and watched the embers slowly
cascade over each other like a molten pool and I watched the fireflies. They
were all over the yard and I suddenly wished Becca was out here to see them. I
thought about the one we hit with the car and gave him a back-story. His
name was Doug and I won't go
into all of the details but it is safe to say that it ended badly for him.
I don't recall ever seeing
a firefly in Florida. I'm sure they might be there but I've never seen one. I
remember watching them in my backyard in Connecticut. I used to imagine them as
elvish sprites scouting the area for dangers and threats before the dark elves
would come out. Hey, fuck you! It was my childhood not yours and you already
know I have a twisted imagination so piss off! I remember seeing them on
camping trips and even once in Tennessee but never in Florida. Maybe I'm just
never outside enough in Florida.
So, tending the dying fire and watching the floating green dots I sat and enjoyed the fresh air and let my mind wander. The air up there gives me some of my favorite ideas for stories and characters. In the middle of doing nothing I noticed that one of the fireflies was pale, almost white and moving differently than the others. It took me a second but I finally snapped back to reality and to my surroundings. I had forgotten where I was but I remembered quickly when the white firefly moved left and a second one appeared just to its right. Eyes. I was a fool for not noticing it earlier. While spotting and especially while driving you look for the eyes. I quickly judged the height and movement of the animal and surmised it was a small deer. Wolves, bobcat, bear and coyotes are up here too so I had to think about it for a second and decided on small deer. I felt stupid for being so far from the house without so much as a stick to hold in front of me. Deer go out from behind the house every day, they are a common sight and while I never tire of seeing them, they are, common. I've seen one bear (surprisingly small) and plenty of fox out here. Once I got inside the house I felt better but after being foolish enough to forget my surroundings I felt better calling it a small deer.
Saturday was the family reunion. We arrived just as things were getting set up in earnest. Dick put me in charge of building the fire and keeping it going. One of the young distant cousin's is a sou chef so he started taking over cook duties on the fire. I was more than happy to let him. On our second "Beer run" Teresa spotted a bottle of "ApfelKorn" and by the time we were ready to start cooking the burgers and dogs, I was looking at the bottom of the bottle. Dick was cooking up some delicious frog legs and jumbo shrimp on the stove top, Todd was now in charge of the meats. All I had to do was sit back, enjoy the breeze and drink. Somehow I got dragged into a game of kickball with the kids but I insisted on being designated pitcher. You don't want to see this fat guy run with a drink in his hand. We all had a nice time. Becca felt left out as usual, Teresa got to visit with her family, Dick, Jerry and I drank enough to be glad that Teresa was driving home. On the way home, Jerry was telling Teresa about one time when his alternator went out while driving this road. She flipped her lights off for a split second and actually yelped at how utterly dark it was. I wouldn't want to be out there, coasting the truck back down the hill without lights. It was black as can be and with those hills and curves, someone could be on top of you before they even saw you. Some of those curves up there are so tight I swear I see my own tail lights when I go around the corners.
Sunday was nice. We got
up and the girls went shopping while Jerry and I drove out to pick up Dick and
take him back up to Wilcox to get his truck. Just about the time we got back
(after taking a LOT of scenic routes) we settled in for a nap and the girls
walked in about twenty minutes later. We sat around for a little bit and heard
a helicopter flying low. We went outside and sure enough it was flying low, it
landed in the field next door. The fire truck and ambulance showed up minutes
later and transferred some guy to the helicopter for transport to Pittsburgh.
We're taking bets. My money is on an ATV accident. Lots of kids on ATVs up
here and not a week goes by without someone getting hurt on one.
After gawking at the
rescues vehicles (with binoculars) I stayed outside and enjoyed the breeze.
It's been in the 60's in the morning and climbs into the mid 70's in the
afternoon. It was threatening rain today but it never happened around us.
During one of our drives we hit some spots where the rain had just fallen but
not one drop hit us. It has been beautiful weather up here.
The girls took us out to
dinner and I found a spot along the way that had enough cell coverage to call my
Dad. He was on his way back to church for the evening but I had a nice chat
with him. He normally passes me off to Mom but this time I got to talk with
him.
We crashed early because
Lizzy had school in the morning and we had a long drive in to Pittsburgh. Just
about the time we were ready to doze off, Teresa bolts upright and says, "What
the Hell was that?" Bobbing around Becca's bed is two more lightning bugs. We
just couldn't get away from them this week I guess.
This morning we got up, saw Lizzy off to school and got on the road. The drive in was smooth and quick until Jerry said that there was normally more traffic on a Monday morning. Just over the next ridge, bumper to bumper traffic. Of course. After twenty minutes of that, they dropped me off and I flew home. The airport was simple enough. There was a normal line for security but nothing like the mammoth Disneyesque line we had to endure a few years ago. The only real trouble I had was one of the rent-a-cops took issue with my t-shirt. I had gotten looks from it all morning, most of them smiles and giggles, one quizzical and another dismissive. It simply says, "You don't see me, I'm Obfuscating". You can see on people's faces those that get it and/or figure it out from those that have no clue. It is a simple shirt, no big deal. The line-furher that singled me out obviously didn't get it. Did she have a bad morning? Did she have a bad homelife? I don't know but I WANT to know why I attract the people that take great joy in giving me shit! She pointed to my shirt and asked what it meant. I laughed while I told her, expecting that she was just curious like everyone else that asks. She looked more confused and walked away. She went over to the podium and asked her supervisor/manager/fellow-flunkie about me. The other woman (a large pasty white woman with a name-tag of "Shirley") came over and looked at me, turned toward the security guard and said, "It's just a t-shirt, let it go." I had no idea that I was now a suspect simply because I use words (or closer to the truth, wear a t-shirt that uses words) that some people don't understand. If I wore a shirt that had a picture of a gun on it, would it be an issue? What about my "Knights Who Say Ni!" T-shirt? It has a picture of a sword, would it cause problems? Why do these people single me out? I swear I was just smiling and minding my own business. This time...
Just because you don't have a decent command of the English language or the language skills to infer enough of the meaning given the context, don't hold me down to your paltry standards. The whole point of the stupid shirt is the fact that it is an under used word and a LOT of people don't know what it means. And just for a second, let's say I decided to use my evil genius for bad rather than good... Would I wear a t-shirt announcing my bad intentions in obscure words if I was up to no good? I'd love to tell you that she had the three inch fingernails and three foot hairdo but that was not the case. It would make the story a little better but, not true.
Oh well, I landed in Atlanta ready for my four hour lay-over. I pulled out the laptop and typed away. I called Wade who reset my password on the website but after hanging up I found that I couldn't upload any data. We fixed that later on and now you are finally reading the results of many hours labor. While on the phone, Wade offered to pick me up at the airport which was really nice of him. I was going to just cab it home but he insisted on coming to get me. I didn't make any plans because I didn't want to bother anyone. It's unusual for me to ask for help and it is really nice when people offer. It makes me feel all warm and gushy... Ewww...
When I was in Pittsburgh they announced they needed seats and I volunteered because the later flight still allowed me to keep the same connector to Jacksonville. Lay-over in Atlanta or lay-over in Pittsburgh, I'm stuck here either way. They ended up with enough seats and didn't need mine. Sitting here in Atlanta they made the same announcement but this time I can't volunteer, I have to get home, I have to get away from all these people!
I ended up being almost an hour late coming into Jacksonville. The plane came in to Pittsburgh early and we boarded a full thirty minutes before the flight time on the boarding pass. Then, we sat. And sat. We rolled another hundred feet down the tarmac and sat some more. We were scheduled to come in to Jacksonville at 6:56 and at 6:48 I looked out the window and saw eight planes in line in front of us ready to take off. We finally took to the air and after a surprisingly short flight landed safely and luckily Wade was still there to get me. I felt bad about being late, that's one of the reasons I didn't want to impose on anyone by asking them to pick me up but he was cool about it.
Well, that about wraps up the trip. I went, I had fun, I came home. Not much more to say. Teresa and Becca will be back before the 4th of July. Jerry and Lizzy will be coming with them and Lizzy will stay a few weeks here with us. Teresa has a lot of plans for the girls for the summer. If I have to work Orlando again this summer they will come and stay with me and hit all the water parks during the day while I'm working. That sounds like fun and it keeps me out of the water so it works for everyone. Lots to do, schedules fill up fast.
Monday, 6-4-7
I could have stayed in Jacksonville today. I did absolutely nothing today at work. I waited and I waited. In fact, the only time I left the hotel room was about two hours ago to get some dinner. I hope tomorrow goes better than this.
I got back here just in time to watch game 4 of the Stanley Cup. I tune in and see Alanis Morrisette singing the national anthems. It was the first time I heard someone singing it in their own style and still sounding good. She's got that style of going flat or kicking up a note at the end of a word. If you know her music you would be able to tell it was her singing but other than that she maintained the integrity of both songs. Actually, she got off light, the stadium sang most of "Oh Canada". Normally pop singers butcher them but it sounded alright.
I'm rooting for Ottawa because they are like the Chicago Cubs, they never expected to make it to the Finals. They never win the championship. But they try every damn year. So it's rare that I root for the Canadian team but I really don't like the American team they are going against. The "Mighty Ducks of Anaheim", someone should be shot for that marketing decision. Especially since Disney has sold off the team and they retained the name! Even if the Disney name didn't bother me, look at the naming convention. Every other sports team is [City] [Team]. If they were the Anaheim Ducks I probably wouldn't even have noticed them. How stupid would you sound if you were in a bar watching a football game and you rooted for the "Mighty Dolphins of Miami"? You'd sound like a dork and you'd probably get your ass kicked! The "Mighty" part is also an issue. How fucking tough is a duck? The Mighty Velociraptors of Mars sounds good, but a duck? Pittsburgh named their team the Penguins but they didn't add a modifier just to make them sound tough. "The Barfighting Penguins of Pittsburgh"? Nope, wouldn't sound very good would it?
Ok, and for a final reason why I don't like the Disney Ducks, they are the team that started the "third jersey" mess and now home teams are wearing away colors and away teams are wearing white... all in the name of making more money. Selling that obsessive fan the third jersey. Like Marvel and DC, selling the same crap but in a different cover every week. Now a lot of the teams have third jerseys but it was Eisner's Ducks that started it all... Evil ducks. Oh yes, I said it. Ducks are evil. Because they can swim. I have proof and it comes from the Bible. Noah built and ark right? Took two of each animal on board and God killed all the evil that remained on the planet right? So now you have Noah's two ducks sitting on the ark watching thousands of angry, evil ducks floating alongside the ark plotting their revenge! So from biblical ducks bent on vengeance to Disney invading hockey and ruining the home/away jersey traditions. See, stick around kid, I'll teach you something yet...
The game is over, the Ducks won and now Ottawa has to win the next three games to take the Cup. It doesn't look hopeful. Now I'll probably have to listen to my Canadian friends whining about another commercial American expansion team winning Lord Stanley's Cup once again. Hey, I was a fan of the Quebec Nordiques. I can't help it if they up and moved to Colorado. Don't get on me just because your Canadian market won't support an NHL team. I'm still waiting on the announcement that Jacksonville can't support the NFL team and they are moving "The Mediocre Jaguars of Jacksonville" to another city. The time will come... Oh yes, it will come...
Sunday, 6-4-7
Wow, what a weekend. I was stuck here in Pensacola over the weekend. I had hoped to get in a quick dive this weekend but I forgot that Wade was on a road trip this weekend. New Orleans is only three hours west but it's depressing to drink and gamble alone and Heffner is home this weekend. Every one else that I want to hang out with is busy too so, instead of hanging around, I snuck home this weekend. I got to see Becca do her volunteer work down at the local PBS television station. She impressed all of the people down there and even managed to grab a little screen time. While she was down there I took Teresa out to dinner and shot some pool. It's been a while since we were able to hang out together. Teresa says she had fun even though she hasn't shot pool in over a decade. We picked up Becca and when we got home we went straight to the VCR to see our new star of stage and screen. They liked her so much, they asked if she could come back tonight. I set up the VCR again amidst comments that maybe it's time for us to get a DVR/Tivo.
We got up this morning and went to see the new Pirates movie. Man was that a long flick! We got home just in time to hang out with some friends before Teresa dropped Becca back off at the television station again. I snuck back into Pensacola and I'm about to get some sleep before going in to work tomorrow so that I can sit and wait some more. Oh well. I just don't know anymore...
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